It’s very windy out right now — the house is shaking — and the kids have just gone to bed.
After a particularly big gust:
Amy: Wind ‘cares me Mum.
Me: It’s just wind Amy. It’ll blow the trees around and there will be lots of leaves on the ground in the morning.
Elliot, calling very cheerfully from his room: You like leaves, don’t you Amy?
We went through a rough patch with Elliot when he turned three. It lasted a long time (months), and I am still thankful that we are through it. I spoke to a lot of mums through that time, and they all said that three was their hardest year. And they assured me that four would be much better. They were right.
However. We have a second child, and she appears to be hitting her “three” about five months early. It’s a totally different three from Elliot, but I’m still finding it difficult. There is a whole lot of “NO” being yelled in our house (by her), a whole lot of laughing as she does something she knows is wrong, and a whole lot of unprovoked hitting, almost exclusively aimed at her brother. This morning she walked up to him with a dustpan and whacked him. The other day he was sitting defenseless on the toilet and she ran her fingers roughly down his face.
When I drop them off and pick them up at daycare I feel like I’m barely in control as she refuses to put her inside shoes on, takes forever to put her coat on, wings her coat around hitting other people, and says “no” to me about 20 times. At the dinner table we are constantly asking her to stop pushing her feet against the table, to stop getting off her chair, to stop putting her feet ON the table. Often I’m at a loss as to what the right consequence is. And even when I do have a consequence that makes sense (such as removing her from Elliot’s room when she hits him…something that does hit home for her), she immediately is contrite. She apologizes, says “me don’t do that again” and says she’s ready to stop
I do recognize that this is all normal behaviour, and for the most part I think Greg and I are navigating our way through it with some success. For example, she removed her dishes from the table tonight WITHOUT putting them upside down on her head, and she proudly pointed out to both of us that she was doing it “gently”. So some of it is getting through. And while I feel frustrated at some of her behaviour, what is easier with her than when Elliot was three is she recovers so quickly. So although there is still lots of drama, it’s very short-lived. But it makes for a bit of a roller coaster ride.
I think I just needed to vent a bit. Mission accomplished.
This morning I was on Douglas street, going northbound, waiting at a red light at the Hillside intersection. The light went green, and I went. Some idiot coming up Government (on my left) decided to either run the red or didn’t see that his light was red, and he almost t-boned me. Thankfully he wasn’t going very fast and he was able to stop. I would have been a sitting duck, and Amy was in the car as well, on the same side of the car as me.
Shook me up a bit.
This morning I started a new mum and babe yoga session. This time round I’m taking the class at the local rec centre so I can walk there.
I woke up to some sun, so I decided to time everything so I could take Yoshi for a walk first, with Amy, and then drop him off at home and head to the rec centre. I figured the timing would be good for Amy to get at least an hour of sleeping in, and I’d get Yoshi walked as well.
I got everything ready, which included grabbing poop bags, stroller set up, child fed, child changed, child in jacket and hat, supplies ready for yoga, me showered, me dressed, Yoshi collared up, etc. About five minutes before I left I noticed it was raining, but there was sun out as well, and it didn’t look too bad.
I left the house a bit later than planned, but still with enough time to get Yoshi walked first. By this time it was pouring. I got out the rain cover for the stroller and quickly changed my jacket, and stayed the course. For all of three minutes. I got about 200 feet down the road and when the wind whipped the rain cover off the stroller I decided to abandon ship.
I still needed to give Amy a nap, though, and by this time I only had about 45 minutes before yoga started. I couldn’t really nap her at home because I’d be waking her up 30 minutes in.
So what did I do? Amy and I piled into the car and we went to Starbucks. She had a sleep and I had a chai. So no exercise for the dog, no exercise for me, money spent that wouldn’t have been spent with the original plan, and I drove to the rec centre.
I’m hoping for better luck next week.
Tomorrow is Wednesday, which means I have both kids at home. I have to admit I’m not looking forward to the day. I think it’s because we don’t have plans. Amy was feeling pretty sick today with a cold, so I thought it would be better if we just lay low tomorrow. But I find the day drags when we stay home the whole day.
There’s also laundry to put away, a house to tidy, meals to prepare and more laundry to do. But I think my day will be easier if I just ignore that stuff (except maybe the meal part of things) and focus on the kids. When I try to get household chores done I often end up frustrated because I get pulled in different directions.
Maybe we won’t even get out of our pajamas…
My sister is going to be at my Mum’s for a very brief visit on her way to NZ, so we planned a trip to the mainland this coming weekend to see her. Elliot, Amy and I took the ferry over today, and Greg’s going to join us tomorrow evening. So take note: there’s a two-to-one child-to-parent ratio happening here.
We went to preschool this morning, then left Oak Bay at about 11:30 for the 1:00 ferry. As I approached the highway sign that displays the ferry information, I barely scanned it, confident in the fact that we’d have no trouble getting on the 1:00 ferry.
Wait (squints her eyes), does that say “1 Sailing Wait”?? Not possible. Yes, possible. And underneath that, additional information saying that the 3:00 was already 58% full. Cheepers! There goes my Macdonald’s stop. And OMG, what am I going to do at the ferry terminal with two kids, in the rain, for almost three freakin’ hours?
I briefly wondered why it was so busy, but then remembered tonight’s Madonna concert at BC Place. If I hadn’t remembered, I would have realized some concert was happening once I got on the ferry, based on the fact that 95% of the ferry passengers were dressed to go clubbing.
So, what does one do for three hours at a ferry terminal in the rain with two kids? We went to the bathroom (with three of us, that took a bit of time), we got hot dogs and chocolate milk (with the amount of people there, that also took a bit of time), and we played with the touch screen TV and learned a bit about British Columbia. But most of the time was spent sitting in the waiting room watching the big trucks drive into the ferry terminal. Thankfully Elliot loves trucks and Amy doesn’t care what she does at this point in her life, as long as she’s fed.
It really wasn’t that bad. And the actual ferry ride was fine. There weren’t a lot of two and three-year-olds going to see Madonna, which meant there weren’t a lot of kids in the play area, which is always a better situation for Elliot. He actually played with one little girl, Emma, for quite a while, and Amy enjoyed watching all the movement.
We arrived safe and sound (but tired) at Mum’s, had the ultimate comfort food for dinner — homemade mac and cheese and homemade bread — and the kids were in bed before 8:00.
And I’ll be in bed before too long!